President's Truth Team To Be Headed By Dr. Billingsgate
BILLINGSGATE POST - President Obama's re-election team on Monday rolled out a campaign to recruit two million supporters to help debunk attacks on the president's record and hit back at his Republican rivals. To be called the "Truth Team," the Dem...
Read full storyQueen's Valentine's Day seizure as Middleton family's 'Meet The Fockers' video diary published
London - It was a 'Can you believe I fathered him with just one testicle? Imagine how he would have turned out if I had had two?' kinda moment according to Carole and Michael Middleton's description of their first tête-à-tête with Charles and Camilla...
Read full storyAirbags Adding Safety to New Nuke Plants
Augusta, Georgia -- An electric utility here is building the first new nuclear generating plants to be constructed in the US since 1978. Its safety secret: the use of giant, automotive type airbags to cushion and protect the facility from the destruc...
Read full storyObama To Balance Budget By Taxing Housewive's Imputed Income
BILLINGSGATE POST - President Barack Obama announced today his plan to balance the budget on the backs of American housewives. Citing a study by Harvard economists who evaluated what a "full-time-stay-at-home" mother should make if she were paid for...
Read full storyKaty Perry Hits Back At Her Soon-To-Be-Ex-Husband Russell Brand With Her Brand New Song Which She Sang On The Grammy Award Show
LOS ANGELES - Russell Brand filed for divorce from his wife Katy Perry on December 30, 2011. And on February 12, 2012, at The 54th Annual Grammy Awards Show little Katy got to kick Mr. Brand right below the belt. Katy belted out her new song "Part...
Read full storyFrankie Cocozza Disturbing Exclusive Interview
Frankie Cocozza World Exclusive Interview Frankie smelling of beer, weed and perfume wearing a patterned gravy stained top with a pair of skinny jeans and a pair of women's knickers revealing out the crack of his ass walks groggily into the interview room. He scratches his bird's nest full of hair and slumps into the leather sofa farting but starts moving shiftily as though it was the settee t...
Read full storySun to Defy Police State
The Sun has come out to warn the Government that it will not lie down under the heel of the fascist POLICE STATE. 'Asking questions is our business' said a hooded figure somewhere in Wapping 'we now have to hide our identities so that we will not...
Read full storyLiverpool's Luis Suarez Is 'Sorryish' About Patrice Evra Farce
Luis Suarez, the Liverpool striker at the centre of the racist abuse/non-handshake/lack of suitable, meaningful apology scandal, has said in a statement today that he is "sorryish" about the whole affair, and wishes it would all go away. Suarez, 2...
Read full storyAli Dizaei 'welcome to apply for Tehran top cop post' says Ahmadinejad
Tehran - Iran's President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad condemned today's conviction of the ex-Met Commander on corruption and perversion of course of justice charges. And in a touching gesture of realpolitik the Iranian leader has offered to fast track Diz...
Read full storyRacist hits out at 'racist' Africa Cup of Nations winners
A Suffolk based racist has hit out at Africa Cup of Nations winning side Zambia for 'not fielding any white players'. Mike Stuffer, 60, a semi retired Tax accountant from Bungay is furious that the Zambian national football team is entirely made u...
Read full storyMicrosoft Office 365 - Almost always on
Microsoft's new cloud-based collaboration and productivity offering, Office 365, is designed to provide an 'anytime, anywhere' service. It promises 24/7 access for 365 days of the year. Unfortunately 2012 is a leap year, and Microsoft has confirmed...
Read full storyHate Apps? There's an app for that
If there is one person on the planet who hates apps, editor of App World! e-magazine, Max Buck, has yet to meet him. "Admittedly," said Buck, "I don't generally talk to anybody who doesn't own an iPhone, and all iPhone users love apps. This leads...
Read full storyAdele's Voice Destroyed by Oversinging and Vocal Cord Nodules
Woody Alllen said that politicians are one step below child molesters. Many music industry people are one step below politicians. As British born beauty Asma al Assad speaks out in favor of her charming husband Bashar al Assad Whitney Houston just jo...
Read full storyAdele Wins 6 Grammy Awards - President Obama Invites Her To The White House
LOS ANGELES - The stars of the Staples Center in Los Angeles are usually dressed in basketball uniforms as it is the home arena of the NBA Los Angeles Lakers. But on Sunday the Staples Center was the home to The 54th Annual Grammy Awards. And t...
Read full storyWorld comes to halt as news of Whitney Houston death emerges
All other news was cancelled today as the world was coming to terms with the sudden death of American songstress Whipney Houston on the eve of the Grammys. Protesters in Egypt declared a 24 hour ceasefire, as activists in Syria laid to rest their...
Read full storyAmericans still unsure about Adele's nationality
Despite her bumper haul of awards at last night's Grammy awards Americans are still confused about exactly where Adele is from. The confusion, although not affecting U.S sales of her album 21, is causing some Americans to question just how 'into'...
Read full storyTroops on stand-by as Abu Qatada invited to Palace for Valentine's Happy Meal
London - The Queen's face turned puce this morning as flunkeys revealed the ID of the 'Secret Valentine' being parachuted in by human frights lawyers to dinner at the Palace tomorrow night. Apparently it's part of the rehabilitation of fat extremi...
Read full storyPitch Invasion Thug Banned
A Thug who ran on to the Anfield pitch and threatened a goalkeeper in front of TV cameras has been banned from all football matches. Cat Anfield Cat aged 3, ran on to the Anfield pitch during Liverpool's Premier League tie with Tottenham Hotspur o...
Read full storyTrain Chaos 'caused by too many layers'
London- Emergency workers and National rail staff blame rail chaos on passenger's clothing. Staff battling to end the Monday morning rush-hour chaos that crippled London's Thameslink rail route have revealed the cause of the delays - a 'silly moo'...
Read full storyBAFTA Outrage Sensation Shock Horror
Scenes at the Bafta award ceremony resembled 'the worst examples of footballing outrage' as George Clooney, who was turned down for 7 awards (beating a previous 4 failures to win acclaim) refused to shake hands with the French star of the winning fi...
Read full storyCouncil paying private company £2.45 a call to answer phone inquiry!
Southwark Council is paying a private company £2.45 a call to answer phone inquiries. The company, 'Vangent', handles about a million calls a year from residents in the London borough of Southwark. The firm charges the council 71p just to pick...
Read full storyCatholic Church Nominated for Doublethink Award
The Catholic Church has once again been nominated for the Doublethink Award, given annually to the person or organization that most ingeniously epitomizes the Orwellian concept of 'doublethink'. For those who have never read George Orwell's 1984,...
Read full storyAngry God Smites Whitney Houston Over Facebook Post
God, "angry beyond belief" at a facebook posting a young woman made, smote Whitney Houston over the weekend as "punishment," and posted the divine act to his Youtube account. "I'm tired of you badmouthing me on the internet," the Lord of Hosts sa...
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