Southwark Council is paying a private company £2.45 a call to answer phone inquiries.
The company, 'Vangent', handles about a million calls a year from residents in the London borough of Southwark.
The firm charges the council 71p just to pick up the phone each time someone rings the switchboard. And it costs the town hall almost £4 each time Vangent processes a payment to the council from a resident.
The contractor also charges about £10 to process each complaint.
Inchcock Industries of Nottingham, currently in a state of bankrupcy, has applied to the Southwark Council, to offer the following services to them:
Dog Poo Removal Advice Line Call-Centre Services Enquiries
55p a call per minute
From our Bulgarian Call-Centre
Pigeon Poo Advice Line Call-Centre Services Enquiries
54p a call per minute
From our Scottish Call-Centre
Job-centre queuing Advice Line Call-Centre Services Enquiries
3p per hour
From our Nottingham Call-Centre
Bus Stop notices and Graffiti Clarification Advice Line Call-Centre Services Enquiries
15p per minute - Return ticket Clarifications @ 28p per minute
From our Outer Peruvian Call-Centre
Computer Hacking Problems Advice Line Services Enquiries
£5 per minute
From our Nigerian Call-Centre
Which Shop Will Close Down Next Advice Line Services Enquiries
1p per day
From our Nottingham Call-Centre
Pensioner Dying of Cold Advice Line Services Enquiries
0.001% of pension per call
From our Nottingham Call-Centre
Immigration Support Advice Line Services Enquiries
Free
From our Pakistani, Chinese, Polish, Bulgarian, Indian, Iraqi, Albanian, Armenian, Afghanistan, Kosovan, Azerbaijan, Lithuania, Belarus, Bosnia and Herzegovina, Croatian, Czech, Estonian, Greek. Turkish, Kazakhstan, Latvian, Macedonian, Slovakian, Muldovian, Kyrgyzstan, Pakistan, Uzbekistan, Turkmenistan, & Iranian, Botwanian, Burundian, Ethiopian, Jamaican, Laos, Madagascan, Gambian, Syrian, Lebanon, Nicaraguan, Rwandan, Swaziland, Trinidad & Tobagan, & Zambian Call-Centres
Financial Management Advice Line Services Enquiries
€12,545 per call
From our Greek Call-Centre
Mr Inchcock was unavailable for comments as he was accompanying Southwark Councillors on a fact finding mission to assess the optimum height of bus time table lamp-post displays in Barbados for the month.