
Moon-landing hoax cover-up continues via 'Tricky Dick' Docs
In recent weeks documents have surfaced proving the existence of Operation Moon-Dog Hoax, perpetrated by the United States Government to fool the world into believing a man was actually sent to the moon, bailout plan should it have been decided to ab...
Read full story
Russian version of eBay closes
eBay, the auction bidding site has been forced to close their Russian version after it was discovered that the site was being used to sell harvested body parts. "It certainly upped the yuck factor," said Chief of Police Yuri Trubble. "Contrary to...
Read full story
Scottish Football Poised for Thrilling Season
Pundits across Scotland are rubbing their hands at anticipation at what promises to be one of the most enthralling campaigns for many years. "I can't wait" says Dundee football correspondent Matty McStay, "United have got in the exciting talent, y...
Read full story
Be careful what you name your children and......other things.
I was in a store yesterday and a young woman was in there with her sweet little girl, about 18 months old. A cashier was talking to them and said, "Hello honey. You are such a cutie." She didn't know the mom and toddler. "She thinks you know her name," giggled the young mother. I was shocked that the young mother had actually named her daughter 'Honey'...even more shocked than I was when...
Read full story
Chris Evans, The Star of "Captain America: The First Avenger," Reveals Some Behind-The-Scenes Tidbits
HOLLYWOOD - Massachusetts native Chris Evans says that he has never been prouder of one of his movies as he is about Captain America: The First Avenger a film based on the Marvel Comics character. He recently spoke with Voodoo Dupree of The West H...
Read full story
When Aunt Doris Came To Stay (Part Two)
Most of the toy cars I'd play with had chipped paint and scratches on them. That didn't happen when playing with them on a carpet, it happened when playing with them on the landing up our stairs. Through the banisters there was quite a long drop down to the linoleum passageway going along by our kitchen door. In my child's mind of course it wasn't a landing area at the top of a flight of stairs, i...
Read full story
When Aunt Doris Came To Stay (Part One)
It began in childhood. The first time was to do with a small cardboard box. I'm not sure exactly what year that was, but it was Christmas. I'd guess it was around 1962, so quite a long time ago. Aunt Doris - or 'Doll' as mum and dad would call her - I remember not understanding why they'd call her a doll, she didn't look anything like the dolls the girls along our street would play with. Anyway...
Read full story
Spoof Forum, Possibly the most boring place on the planet? Shame.
Once upon a time, there was a vibrant, interesting, funny, inteligent forum, it existed not in the minds of raving lunatics, but was real. 90% of the devotees, were by their very nature, Mental, but this made the place vibrant and hilarious. In other words, the patients, running the asylum, One flew over the cuckoos nest, some say, it settled on the roof, and began to breed. Then, when the f...
Read full story
Carlos Irwin Estevez Has Sent Resume to Tiger Woods Applying For Job of Caddy
Tiger Woods is caddyless and is advertising for a new caddy. This morning amongst the pile of resumes he received was a fifteen page resume from someone named Carlos Irwin Estevez. Not recognizing the name Tiger was about to put the resume on the...
Read full story
Confusion as Millican Missing from Television Panel Shows
Geordie comic Sarah Millican has caused uproar amongst telly addicts by failing to appear on television for over a week. The whereabouts of Miss Millican are unknown and police have begun a search to find her and get her back on our screens as soo...
Read full story
'Headless' Kate Middleton wedding dress 'is guillotine omen'
London - It's the clearest indication yet that horrid Bill Clinton/Cherie Blair doppelganger Kate Middleton could be flung in the Tower and summarily decapitated for treason. The bigamous wife of a senior Tory cabinet minister, Middleton seemed ob...
Read full story
Ten Top Really Crap Things To Do To Make You Feel Better When You're Feeling Suicidal
Depressed? Feeling a tad suicidal are we? Never mind. Doesn't bother me in the least. But here are ten top really crap things to do if you feel like popping your own cork. 1 - Play Sinead O'Connor's 'Nothing Compares 2 U.' You don't really want to listen to this. What you need to do is convince yourself that you're not really suicidal at all, and that life's great. Life's not really...
Read full story
Tiger Woods to Carry His Own Bag
Bored with golf Tiger Woods has turned the sport into a soap opera. In the latest installment of 'Breaking Wind: The Tiger Woods Story' Tiger Woods has fired his long time caddy New Zealander Steve Williams. Helping Tiger Woods to victory in 13 of hi...
Read full story
Demi's Dilemma - Demi Lovato Trying To Choose Between Ryan Phillippe and Darren Criss
LOS ANGELES - The star of the Disney Channel show Sonny With A Chance Demi Lovato has found herself in a situation that lots of girls her age would like to be in. Demi has become quite attracted to Darren Criss, one of the stars of the hit televis...
Read full story
Does this Spoof writer qualify for a disability pension? Technology is driving me crazier than I was
Many years ago, around 1957,I was totally fascinated by the television set my dad bought when I was about 9 years old. A small black and white picture came into our living room each day, to amuse us and bring us World News. No needed to get off the couch to change channels, we only had ONE. We DID have to wait a few minutes for the t.v. to 'warm up' though. The test card showed when there...
Read full story
Local Rapper Loses Credibility After Drug Charges Are Dropped
Hip-Hop artist Keyz has spent much of the last year in a legal struggle, after drug distribution charges were leveled against him in early 2010. The Chicago native, who's most notable for his Top 40 smash "No, But I Fa' Real Sell Drugs," had an...
Read full story
How Spoof Writer got to 'first base' with professional hockey player
It happened a number of years ago, admits female Spoof Writer. People are gobsmacked when I tell them I got to first base with a professional hockey player. I don't want to embarrass him by mentioning his name, but he owns a large lake-front property in Port Dover, Ontario. This truly happened. He was visiting his brother at the school his brother, and our Spoof Writer, were both teachi...
Read full story
Dinosaur footprint-shaped Moon crater 'is giant marijuana leaf fossil' - report
Space - Did the Universe's founding fathers seed more than just humans during their insemination of our solar system? A new report this weekend from the Lunar Prospector mission's on-board gamma-ray spectrometer has found 'highly significant' new...
Read full story
China and Nepal slowly crush India
Nepal are to re-measure Mount Everest after a dispute with China about its true height. After watching a geology show on BBC HD with Richard Hammond last night, our intrepid reporter Taribo West knows how mountains are formed. "Basically, its two...
Read full story
Financial cuts to police service puts game birds at risk
Planned cuts in the police department may not be popular with many, but one section of society who are elated with the news are thieves. LancsNews's talented and outrageous reporter Taribo West tracked a robber and found him in his secret cave. Th...
Read full story
2011's most popular baby names still Adolf and Gertrude
The British Association for the Counting Of Names (BACON) has published its yearly list of the most popular names given to baby boys and girls. Unsurprisingly, Adolf and Gertrude top the list yet again. Genghis is up to second place for boys and also makes the girls' list at number 10. The top 10 names for boys were: 1. Adolf 2. Genghis 3. Santa 4. Oedipus 5. Clarkson 6. Attila 7. M...
Read full story
Tiger Woods and Caddy Now Embroiled in Rights to "Little Black Book!"
No sooner had Tiger Woods cut his 12 year association with his New Zealand based caddy, Stevie Williams, than an important legal issue arose over caddies' rights to their 'little black book', the bible that lists yardages on every course, and restric...
Read full story
US Army gays to wear orange jump suits
The Pentagon has announced plans to force openly gay soldiers serving in the US army to wear orange jump suits to give their heterosexual counterparts the due notification of their presence within their battalion, according to reports. Defence Se...
Read full story
Police to cut brown envelope receptacles by 14%
The HM Inspectorate of Constabulary has confirmed they will be drastically slashing the number of brown envelope receptacles in operation across the force in the UK, according to research conducted by the body. It is expected that there will be 34...
Read full story
TV Celebrity Panel Show QI Slammed
The popular BBC2 comedy quiz show, QI has been slammed as "Less accurate than Wikipedia, and that's saying something!" by polymath Polly Glott. Glott is widely regarded by herself as an expert on more subjects than any other person on Earth. "...
Read full story
Obama Denies Buckingham Palace Downloading Rumor
American president Barack Obama has denied illegally downloading the 1989 Oscar-winning film, Driving Miss Daisy, during his stay at Buckingham Palace. It is believed that Obama, on his recent tour of Europe, downloaded the movie directly after th...
Read full story
The Story Behind The Randy Jackson Vs. Cedric The Entertainer Feud
AVOCADO HEIGHTS - One of the judges of American Idol, Randy "The Black Dawg" Jackson was sitting at a Cackle Cackle Chicken Diner in Avocado Heights when he was asked what he thought about the new game show It's Worth What? Jackson put down his ch...
Read full story
Elin Nordegren Shocks Her New Billionaire Boyfriend By Telling Him He Will Not Get Past 'Third Base'
STOCKHOLM, Sweden - Sweden's richest woman Elin Nordegren who came about her $342 million from her divorce settlement from Tiger Woods aka "Dick With Feet" has laid down the ground rules to her new boyfriend one of Sweden's richest bachelor's James "...
Read full story
Russia accepts beer is alcoholic, Vodka drinkers scoff...
After years of thinking beer was made of nothing but fruit juices and water, Dmitry Medvedev has been forced to change his mind by the World Health Organisation. The passing of a bill by the Russian President which accepts beer is an alcoholic bevera...
Read full story