THIS WEEK'S BEST SELLING RECORDS. Top 20 1. Now I Must Die. Help me... Please! Please! Please! 2. Tomorrow I Must die. Or... the day after. 3 Stop Hurting me. Please... Please... before I kill you. 4. Without You, what is the use of Living? 5. If You Go Away I will die from dope or alcohol, just to Please you. 6. I Can't Live with or Without you. I am a Freemason. 7. If you go Away, so mu...
Air Conductor Jean-Luc Gingembre claimed his all-Europe 2010 Air Conducting championship trophy. To gain this prestigious award, the plucky Frenchman conducted his way through Stravinsky's 'Rite of Spring' in front of an impressed audience of 2,000.
Bangor - The new Cherry Blossom Arena is hosting its first event this evening when the Indie rock band Buster Himen and the Penetrators blow into town for the first concert of their 69-show tour. The band was formed two years ago and is highly re...
Once again it's that time of the year when Britain's answer to 'The Walking Dead' begins series eleven, yes folks it's that clapped-out old chestnut, the 'Crap-Factor' the only show on earth to legally allow day release patients to run amok on live T…
After a tough week in which critics and supporters both agreed that he hadn't fared well in the first live television debate, Alex Salmond has decided to go for the youth vote, promising that never again will Scotland have to listen to the Top 40 wh...
Lana Del Ray (no, we don't know who she is either) has sensationally admitted to sleeping her way around the music industry. The singer (?) said: "I have slept a lot of guys in the industry but none of them helped me get my record deals." Learning of this amazing news BATTL news hastily arranged a interview with her to find out the truth behind the statement. We also took a guitar along...
Pop Slut Superstar Mylie Cyrus posted on her Facebook page today that she is cancelling her upcoming Gaza Strip concert tour due to the escalating "war and stuff" in the region. "I know my fans in Gaza will be really heartbroken that I'm not comin...
Los Angeles - It has been announced that Prince and Bono will team up to record a follow-up to the 1980's anthem "We Are the World" to raise public awareness about the latest immigration crisis along our southern border. Many other artists wer...
"Blurred Lines" Singer Robin Thicke took time out from having sex with a young girl in New York to release a statement dedicating this latest one night stand to his ex wife Paula Patton. "Thinking about you honey, this is for you" said Thicke. The co...
London - After decades of churning out original, trippy, bizarre and beautiful music and selling kazillions of albums, Pink Floyd have announced they intend to release a children's book this summer. Titled, "Dark Side of the Mattress", the book p...
London - Recording superstar and former front man for the band known as Genesis, Phil Collins, admitted this week that the band was not the first rock band created, despite their name correlating with the name of the first book in the Bible. Respo...
Los Angeles - Ryan Seacrest announced this morning that, due to former American Idol finalist Clay Aiken's close results in his bid to win a congressional seat in North Carolina, the show would transition to a clearinghouse for all future politic...
The boy-band One Direction have avoided a multimillion pound claim put against them because of the effectiveness of their wet-floor 'sign guys.' Thousands of One Direction fans packed into the 02 Arena last night, during which a 14-year-old girl w...
Iconic rocker Neil Young has recently told Rolling Stone Magazine that he wishes to change his name to "Neil Old". "It makes sense," justified the almost seventy year old rocker from Canada. "I think it will bring me closer to my fans," he stated...
Ithaca, NY - After years of tireless research at Cornell University, professors have released a study that brings into question the long-accepted fact the late great Freddie Mercury, from the rock band Queen, proclaimed to the world - Fat bot...
WASHINGTON-On Monday, Supreme Court Chief Justice John Roberts announced that he and the other justices will take a break from hearing oral arguments and focus on their music, or as Roberts calls it, "The Pain." The 5-4 decision came after six mon...
Eric Clapton announced today that he would be joining the Circle City Horns of Corona, CA for a 2015 album and world wide tour. The world renowned Circle City Horns were formerly fronted by founder/guitarist/vocalist and arranger Griff Hamlin, as Gri...
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