William Hague - My Fake Diary
Sunday, 12 February 2012
When I awoke this morning and reached across Lucien to get the Vaseline, there was a knock at the bedroom door.
It was Damien, my personal protection officer, he glanced at my swollen foible and said: "Sir, there has been graffiti written on the security gate outside, would you like to see it before we scrub it off?"
I said "Give us a quick flash, and then I'll go with you to look at the graffiti."
Someone had scribbled 'Make Willie Hague work - don't re-elect him!' on the wall nearby.
If only they knew what I do in their name... just ask Lucien, Julian, Damien, Juan, Artemis....
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