William Hague - My Fake Diary

Saturday, 11 February 2012

I had a thought this morning, as Lucien my personal assistant was rousing my interest as he gently woke me up.

'During Britain's "brain drain," not a single politician left the country', I was wondering if I should use that thought to express the loyalty of our members of parliament or not?

Damien, one of my personal protection officers bought me some 'Pillow Sprinkle lavender oil to celebrate my successful visit to Africa. I asked him to come tonight and leave his scent on my pillow, he smiled, tweaked at my groin, and licked his lips.

I'm getting to like him.