Wayne Rooney - My Fake Diary

Wednesday, 17 October 2012

Poland 1 England 1

Scored the goal for England in the first half, but gaffer subbed me just after Poland equalized in the 70th minute. He did the same after i scored twice against Shit Marino on Friday night. Does he not think I can last 90 minutes? Never had any problems with the call girls.

Disappointing that the match was rained off on Tuesday and we had to stay an extra 24 hours. I had to miss the live episode of EMMERDALE on ITV! Asked Colleen to sky-plus it but she doesn't know how.
Apparently she stopped learning to read and write at school when she started going out with me and became a WAG. Silly tart.

On the plus side, got to spend the night in Poland, hit the night clubs and pulled a few polish birds. Bang tidy as as that Lemon bloke says. Not Lemon, I mean Ryan Giggs. That's who I mean.