George W. Bush - My Fake Diary

Wednesday, 6 May 2009

Dear Diary,

W. Here.

I see where somebody done died here in Texas from that swine flu and it's now in over 40 states. What is Osama doing about it? Not a cotton picking thing except to ask us all to cover our faces when we sneeze or cough!

Who does he think he's talking to, little Tommy Tucker?

Now there are hogs running loose her on our ranch. Probably let loose by that Cindy Sheehan woman. It'd bee just like her.

Well, we're headed for our house in Dallas. Lots of people there so, by staying in big crowds, the percentages lower on how many get it.

I mean, if say one in 100,000 get this Swine Flu, it makes more sense to me that here in Crawford your chances is 3 of us, I think.

But in Dallas, one in 100,000 means....

Well crap..we're staying right here. As soon as three people out her get it, the rest of us can go back to riding our segways and jogging and cutting brush.

AND ctching them Sheehan or Michael Moore hogs and barbecuing them suckers.

I like that idea.

They won't.

W.