George W. Bush - My Fake Diary

Tuesday, 7 April 2009

Dear Diary,

W.Here.

I see where Osama made a surprise visit to Iraq.

I remember the first time I did that. I was surprised because I thought we were going to France to see some French people.

I saw on the news of them hugging each other and stuff! Makes me mad. Here, I'M the one who put them there and they go and hug them.

What's all this hugging about anyway. Michelle even hugged the Queen of England.

Maybe they know some kind of Vulcan thing like Spock used to make them drop like a rock.

I used to know the "sleeper hold" those wrestlers do. Dad taught it to me. Says he learned it from a wrestler named Gorgeous George.

Maybe he was Boy George's daddy.

Anyway, dad learned it so he could keep Quayle out of trouble when they made trips together.

I've never been able to do it but Mama used to get the step-over toe-hold on me and I couldn't move.

W.