George W. Bush - My Fake Diary

Friday, 3 April 2009

Dear Diary,

W.Here.

That Mitchelle Osama actually put her arm around the Queen's waist. That's not right. I tried that one time and she whispered, "Let me go you Great Fizzle or I'll have your balls on a chopping block."

Of course, no one would believe me. After I told that to Dick Cheney, the Dickster just told me to cool it.

Dad told me that when Quayle tried to lift her hand and kiss it, she backhanded him across the room and her mother, The Queen Mother, kneed him in the groin.

That's why Dad never sent him over there again.

I bet old Quayle wasn't amused. hee hee.

Every time they showed THE 20, they were all smiles and shaking hands but let me tell you, when the cameras are off, it's a pissing contest.

Wish my head wasn't green. I had all my hair cut off but the top of my head is still green from that idiot neighbor and his bucket of paint over the door.

That's why I haven't been on the news although three networks called me during this G20 thing.

No interviews until my hairs grow back. I got a wig but it makes me look worse than that Jackrabbitevich.

W.


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