Written by Gringo Lobos
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Sunday, 1 October 2017

image for Putin trumps Honky Cat Buffoon Clown Big-Hats™ with Lumo-Hats™
Fashion Designers call the Lumo-Hat™ outrageous and daring and bringing an aura of divine to otherwise grubby terrorist

After Honky Cats Big-Hats™ play for domination of the Buffoon Clown Axis of Evil, Bear Rider Buffoon Clown is making a big move from left field. He is releasing the Kremlins next secret weapon after the successful deployment of Twitter Twatter™ and BookFace espionage tools, Luminous Hats™.

In what fashion designers are calling the biggest freshest thing to come out of the Siberian fashion wilderness in years, the Lumo-Hats™ are the latest weapon in the fight for domination of the Buffoon Clown Axis of Evil and thereby world control. It is sure to up the stakes on the Buffoon Clown Axis of Evil Alliance currently strained by the NFL BratSpat and unconfirmed reports of bucket throwing in the Buffoon Clown Sandpit.

There are already rumors of a shock wave back in North Korea as the full impact of the Lumo-Hat™ move means for its strategic position in the Pacific, sinks in. Analysts were initially worried a Twitter Twatter avalanche could set off an accidental confrontation on an already brittle and tense peninsula.

The North Korean military commanders are said to be hunkered down in their fashion proof war room trying to urgently derive a strategic counter move. The Honky Cat Regime were in urgent international talks with their chief fashion designer Elton John when news leaked about Lumo-Scarf™, this made the already tense situation all the more cataclysmic as they only have Big-Hat™ weapons to counter. "Such a weapon as Big-Scarf™ could take years to develop", one North Korean Scientists moaned. He went on to say, "and even if we do develop Big-Scarf™ we do not know whether it will counter Lumo-Scarf™ in any battle for world domination."

In further bad news for Honky Cat Buffoon Clown, Putin intends to franchise a wide range of Lumo-Wear™ to other hate groups around the world. They will be marketed as the latest in trendy fashion for the discerning terrorists. They are working on Lumo-Boots™ for jungle insurgents and more tamer Lumo-Cardigan™ for the European market. They are confident that with a superior product and an introductory offer of a free Kalashnikov for new Lumo-Wear™ buyers they are sure to out compete Honky Cat.

Dotard Buffoon Clown has yet to strategically respond to the latest move and only lamely tweeted from his golf club that Honky Cat and Bear Rider were nasty women and ingrates.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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