MEXICO CITY - (Satire News) - Reports coming out of The Land of Ole, Ole, Ole, state that the Republic of Mexico has had it with the drug antics of Guatemala.
Mexico's President Andres "Andy" Lopez Obrador, points out that he has warned the drug cartels of Guatemala to stop shipping their U.S. bound damn, expensive, smelly, fucking drugs through his country.
President Andy, as the people of Mexico affectionately call him, has suggested to the D.C.s (drug cartels) that they ship their damn drugs via UPS, FedEx, or Matador Transport.
Andy, as his wife Simona Sinaloa Lopez, refers to him notes that her "Esposo" (husband) is so stressed out about the whole fucking drug thing, that sometimes he cannot even finish the sex act, and she reveals that she hates not getting to get her customary 2 or 3 O's (orgasms) per their groin doodling session.
SIDENOTE: When asked by a reporter with El Ole News, when the invasion would take place, President Lopez Obrador smiled, took a sip of his Tequila Sunrise, and replied, "The invasion will take place when the invasion takes place. Thank you too much."
