In a Sunday morning twitter storm, President Donald J Trump announced that he has asked leaders of the Taliban, Afghan government and Harry Maguire of the United Kingdom to join him at Camp David.
Nobody in the White House could immediately explain the tweet, let alone explain who the fuck Harry Maguire is. A portion of one of the president's tweets attempted to explain. "Harry Maguire is a winner! He won the lottery in Great Britain, and that's good enough for me. He said he would be "chuffed" to come help negotiate peace in Afghanistan. I have aides looking into what 'chuffed' means, but it is something like Covfefe. It is wonderful, we'll see what happens."
White House aides, including the security members of Trump's cabinet, could not be found for comment by anyone, and, in fact, have not been seen for days. Trump seems to now be truly on his own with no handlers....accept for perhaps Harry Maguire.