There was a minor nautical disturbance in a relatively serene part of the country on Friday night, when a man having a bath broke wind, shattering the silence for others in the vicinity.
The scene of the incident was the East Yorkshire resort of Oaf-on-Sea, where Myke Woodson, 57, lives with his mother in her tiny bungalow.
Woodson, having perused the newspaper and discovered there was nothing worth watching on the television, decided to have a relaxing bath, and filled the tub with hot water and some bubble bath.
Ten minutes later, as he reclined in the sweet-scented froth, Woodson felt a rumbling in his rectum, and knew, instinctively, there was about to be a major gas explosion.
He tried to sit up slightly to aid the smooth passage of the gas, but, as he did, there was a loud squirting sound, as if millions of tiny bubbles had been expelled from a garden hose nozzle being held under the surface in a water butt. This was followed by a sub-aqua gargling sound, as the fart reverberated against the plastic base of the bath, and a ghastly smell rose to the surface with toxic bubbles.
Woodson's mother, in her bedroom across the hallway, heard the sound. She said:
"I was sitting in front of my mirror, brushing my hair, when I heard it. I thought it was the neighbor with his drill. Then I remembered who was in the bath!"