A man who should probably know better at his age, has revealed how, during a motorbike ride to his place of employment this morning, he took aim with a child's plastic 'gun', and fired a tiny stone from it at a cow's behind, scoring a direct hit.
It might almost have been said, that he scored 'a bull's arse."
Moys Kenwood, 57, travels to work each weekday as a pillion passenger on his wife's motorbike, and the pair regularly encounter an array of stray animals that make a nuisance of themselves by encroaching onto the road.
Dogs, chickens, ducks, goats, and cows all wander aimlessly into the paths of oncoming traffic with frustrating regularity, and the Englishman had decided to take steps to mete out punishment for these transgressions, and to teach the perpitrators a valuable lesson.
From his son, he commandeered a plastic toy gun worked by a rubber band-release firing mechanism, and scoured his back garden for small stones to use as 'bullets', which he put in a small plastic bag.
This morning, then, as the pair set off for Battambang, Kenwood loaded his gun and patiently waited for the jaywalkers he knew would come.
At about the halfway mark, he could see a cow on the road up ahead, and, as his wife took the precautionary measure of slowing the motorbike to walking pace, the evil teacher raised his weapon and fired at the beast's anus.
The cow's rear shuddered.
Then the animal began to do a dance, but, by that time, Kenwood's wife had pulled on the throttle, and the motorbike sped away from the crime scene.
Police are not investigating.
