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Funny story: Harry Maguire Is Going To Smash Prince Andrew's Face In, If He Sees Him

Harry Maguire Is Going To Smash Prince Andrew's Face In, If He Sees Him

As the Jeffrey Epstein paedophile case rages on, even after the mysterious death of the former financier, Manchester United defender Harry Maguire Is rumoured to have said that he is so disgusted with Epstein's former friend, Prince Andrew, that he i...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire Taking Up Too Much Column Space

Harry Maguire Taking Up Too Much Column Space

There was controversy surrounding Manchester United's £80million newboy defender, Harry Maguire, this evening, when the player was adjudged by some people to have been taking up far too much column space in news pages, and to be 'hogging the limeligh...

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Funny story: Peter Schmeichel Says Harry Maguire Is The Best Keeper In The World Right Now

Peter Schmeichel Says Harry Maguire Is The Best Keeper In The World Right Now

Former Manchester United 'custodian of the net', Peter Schmeichel, has said that the club's recent £80million signing of Harry Maguire was a shrewd move, as the former Sheffield United, Hull City and Leicester City player is the best goalkeeper in th...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire The Victim Of Sliding Tackle Near Manchester Arndale Centre

Harry Maguire The Victim Of Sliding Tackle Near Manchester Arndale Centre

There was controversy in Manchester's main shopping area yesterday afternoon, when United's new £80million signing, central defender, Harry Maguire, was the victim of a mindless attack from a member of the general public who approached the player at...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire Is Sick And Tired Of All The Stupid Made-up Stories About Him

Harry Maguire Is Sick And Tired Of All The Stupid Made-up Stories About Him

Manchester United's new £80million star, Harry Maguire, has said he is absolutely "fed up to the back teeth" of all the stories about him circulating on the internet, in which there is absolutely no truth whatsoever. Maguire, 26, signed for United...

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Funny story: Is Gareth Bale On His Way To Hull City?

Is Gareth Bale On His Way To Hull City?

Gareth Bale, the Real Madrid and Wales footballer, who has fallen out of favour at the Bernabeu Stadium, may have found the ideal club with which to play out the rest of his career - Hull City. Bale, 30, is a man who knows what he likes, and he li...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire Says He Didn't Sign Last Season Because Jose Mourinho Was Manager

Harry Maguire Says He Didn't Sign Last Season Because Jose Mourinho Was Manager

Manchester United central defender, Harry Maguire has revealed the real reason he didn't sign for the club a year ago, when Jose Mourinho was the Reds' boss: Jose Mourinho. Maguire, 26, had been on the United radar for the last two summer breaks,...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire Upset At Way Social Media Tossers Keep Spelling His Name Wrong

Harry Maguire Upset At Way Social Media Tossers Keep Spelling His Name Wrong

Harry Maguire, the central defender signed by Manchester United from Leicester City only last week, has spoken out against the countless thousands of people using social media who will insist on spelling his surname incorrectly. Maguire, who cost...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire Involved In Strange Incident Before Match On Sunday

Harry Maguire Involved In Strange Incident Before Match On Sunday

Manchester United's £80million defender, Harry Maguire, has revealed details of a strange incident in the changing room before Sunday's Premier League opener against Chelsea, when the star's head was too big to fit through the headhole in his shirt.

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Funny story: Harry Maguire Given Go-ahead To Stay In Bed Late On Monday Morning

Harry Maguire Given Go-ahead To Stay In Bed Late On Monday Morning

Harry Maguire, the new pin-up boy of football, who signed for Manchester United for £80million from Leicester City last Monday, made his debut at Old Trafford against Chelsea this afternoon, and has received the go-ahead from manager Ole Gunnar Solsk...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire Bookmakers' Favourite To Be UK Charts Christmas Number 1

Harry Maguire Bookmakers' Favourite To Be UK Charts Christmas Number 1

Harry Maguire, the new Manchester United signing who seems to be able to do just about anything everything he puts his hand to, has been made the bookmakers' favourite to reach number 1 in the UK charts at Christmas. This is astonishing news - eve...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire's Premier League Predictions

Harry Maguire's Premier League Predictions

Football is well-and-truly back, and the Premier League kicks off this afternoon with fourteen of the twenty teams in action. That's seven-tenths, or, if you prefer, 70%! Manchester United fans will have to wait until tomorrow to see their expensi...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire To Arm Wrestle Noel Edmonds In Battle To Host 'Deal Or No Deal' Comeback

Harry Maguire To Arm Wrestle Noel Edmonds In Battle To Host 'Deal Or No Deal' Comeback

Harry Maguire, football's golden boy, who signed for Melchester United in an £80million deal last week, could be involved in another 'deal' soon, after Channel 4 announced the sensational comeback of the last truly great TV gameshow, 'Deal Or No Deal...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire To Push Some Buttons On The Hadron Collider

Harry Maguire To Push Some Buttons On The Hadron Collider

Harry Maguire, the Manchester United central defender, has announced he will be flying to Geneva next week, to travel to Cern where scientists continue to work on the Hadron Collider, a big machine with which they are attempting to recreate the condi...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire Debunked By Battlin' Bohunk From Beaver Crossing

Harry Maguire Debunked By Battlin' Bohunk From Beaver Crossing

BILLINGSGATE POST: In a fight touted to be a walkover for Harry Maguire, the “Battlin' Bohunk” from Beaver Crossing, the redoubtable Slim Everdingle, threw the fresh-faced, good-looking golden boy from Leicester City out of the ring in a winner-take...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire To Star As The Next James Bond

Harry Maguire To Star As The Next James Bond

The world of British entertainment cheered in unison last night when it was announced that Harry Maguire, the new Manchester United central defender will be the next James Bond. Maguire will replace Daniel Craig, who has been Bond four times, the...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire To Buy Some New Football Boots

Harry Maguire To Buy Some New Football Boots

Harry Maguire, the fresh-faced, good-looking golden boy of English football, who signed for Manchester United for £80million from Leicester City on Monday, says he might buy some new football boots, as a special treat to himself for becoming the most...

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