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Funny story: Britain To Change The Colors of Its Flag

Britain To Change The Colors of Its Flag

LONDON - (Satire News) Prime Minister Boris Johnson has just informed the people of Great Britain that parliament has voted to change the colors of the English flag. The red, white, and blue color scheme was first implemented back on Wednesday, Se…

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Funny story: Sir Topham Hatt sought by London police for deviant porn distribution

Sir Topham Hatt sought by London police for deviant porn distribution

Sir Topham Hatt from the beloved children's show 'Thomas the Tank Engine' is reportedly on the run from the law this morning after it was learned he's at the center of a vast, 20+ year "deviant pornography" ring. Sir Hatt was questioned last year…

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Funny story: British Patriot Awarded 12 Month's Compassionate Leave To Mourn Prince Phillip

British Patriot Awarded 12 Month's Compassionate Leave To Mourn Prince Phillip

A man who is widely recognised as the UK's most patriotic man has been awarded a full year of compassionate leave, following the death of HRH Prince Phillip. Gary Herpe, 51, has lowered the 1,500 individual union jack flags positioned on, around,…

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Funny story: Britain nominated for "Sick Man of Europe"

Britain nominated for "Sick Man of Europe"

Britain is set to reclaim a title it hasn't held since the 1970s - the sick man of Europe. The award is given annually by the European Sickness Bureau (BSE) and in the last few years has been given to Russia, Poland and Turkey. "We're very proud t…

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Funny story: Britannia time portal ruled out

Britannia time portal ruled out

A study at McFly University in Sydney, Australia has concluded that time travel is not a factor in many British people's antiquated attitudes. Professor Bruce Jefferson explained, "Many Brits seem to have a worldview that is stuck in the late Vic…

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Funny story: Undue Russian influence in Britain is minimal says Pushkin & Putin Consulting Services

Undue Russian influence in Britain is minimal says Pushkin & Putin Consulting Services

Concerns over the level of Russian influence in key British services have been dismissed as conspiracy nonsense by Home Office press officer, Dmitry Antonov. There are questions about the restructuring of the British Nuclear Fuels programme by it…

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Funny story: Donald Trump Inivtes Harry Maguire To Assist With Taliban Talks At Camp David

Donald Trump Inivtes Harry Maguire To Assist With Taliban Talks At Camp David

In a Sunday morning twitter storm, President Donald J Trump announced that he has asked leaders of the Taliban, Afghan government and Harry Maguire of the United Kingdom to join him at Camp David. Nobody in the White House could immediately explai...

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Funny story: Donald Trump Calls Boris Johnson His Long Lost Poodle

Donald Trump Calls Boris Johnson His Long Lost Poodle

Speaking from the Rose Garden to reporters today, Donald Trump congratulated Boris Johnson as his selection as Prime Minister of Great Britain. "I don't really understand what makes Britain great since they lost our colonies, but I think that's fine,...

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Funny story: Boris Johnson To Officially Designate Britain As The 51st State Of The USA

Boris Johnson To Officially Designate Britain As The 51st State Of The USA

New Conservative Party leader, Boris Johnson, has spoken to the press after his victory over rival, Jeremy Hunt, was confirmed, and said that his first task was to officially designate Great Britain as the 51st state of the USA. In America, Presid...

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Funny story: Iranians Board British Tanker In Time For Tea

Iranians Board British Tanker In Time For Tea

Today the Iranian Navy boarded the British oil tanker Bloody Hell Brexit Already, but were unable to take command of the vessel. "There simply was not time for such rubbish," said the Captain Reginald Kipling. "We were just pouring tea and having...

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Funny story: Ballsy Brit survives nude swim round Great Britain

Ballsy Brit survives nude swim round Great Britain

Disoriented and confused, 33-year-old Ross Edgy was found off the coast of Scotland (or maybe it was Wales), having swum in circles for 12 days. I left Kent, or maybe it was Limerick, on—well, it was sometime this year, I think—bound for France—or...

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Funny story: Brexit nearly happened in 1886

Brexit nearly happened in 1886

Brexit covers the newspapers these days like a tramp's vomit, but it isn't the first time Britain has considered leaving a large international organisation - it nearly happened in 1886. While the British Empire was approaching its peak, there was a small movement for Britain to leave it. Coincidentally, it was led by my great-uncle, also named Sir Geoffroy Cockface. Sir Geoffroy was trouserer t...

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Funny story: Two Fingers to the EU as UK Signs Trade Deal With Burkina Faso

Two Fingers to the EU as UK Signs Trade Deal With Burkina Faso

"The United Kingdom is open for business, now more than ever," that was Prime Minister Theresa May's post-Brexit message to journalists gathered at No. 10 Downing Street yesterday. Words expelled with both vigor and pomp, she was speaking after sign...

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Funny story: Britain's first Minister for Fashion

Britain's first Minister for Fashion

Prime Minister, Theresa May, has now appointed Britian's first ever Minister for Fashion. Former Lord Chancellor and Brexit architect, Michael Gove, began work yesterday in his new offices just off Carnaby Street. "Couldn't be a better location",...

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Funny story: National Treasures to be Housed in Museum

National Treasures to be Housed in Museum

Britain's National Treasures, including the likes of Julie Walters and Dame Judi Dench, are to be rounded up and housed in a museum it was announced today. The new Culture Secretary, Karen Bradley today unveiled her plans stating that it was vita...

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Funny story: Britain becomes third world country due to lack of third runway at Heathrow

Britain becomes third world country due to lack of third runway at Heathrow

LONDON, ENGLAND - The damning economic report issued today revealed the lowest GDP growth figures in British history, effectively rendering Britain a third world country. Economists, politicians and self-proclaimed "experts" from down the pub wer...

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Funny story: Saudi Arabia to join Top Gear

Saudi Arabia to join Top Gear

RIYADH, KINGDOM OF SAUDI ARABIA - Saudi Arabia, the oil rich Gulf state, has continued its attempt to shake its bad reputation as a regressive, brutal dictatorship by joining the British motoring show Top Gear, replacing host Chris Evans, who left th...

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