Hitler Was A Baby Once, Photos Prove

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Saturday, 20 July 2019

image for Hitler Was A Baby Once, Photos Prove
Coochie-coochie-coo, mein Führer!

News is emerging from southern Germany tonight, to the effect that Adolf Hitler, the former chancellor who lead Germany into the Second Worl War in 1939, and who was responsible for the deaths of millions of innocent Jews, was once a teeny, tiny baby.

It's not uncommon to click one's heels and raise one's hand in a mock Nazi salute whenever Hitler's name is mentioned, and the mental image of the man centers around an intense figure with a moustache, staring piercingly into the distance.

Now, however, it's come to light that the Führer wasn't always such a dictatorial monster, and was, in fact, der Apfel des Auges seiner Mutter.

Photographs of him in swaddling clothes have also been discovered. Indeed, it seems, Hitler was a 'bundle of joy' in his neighborhood, and a popular attraction.

People came from yards around to see him, touch his little forelock, and speak in babyish German gibberish to the tot who would later create the Totenkopf.

He would laugh and giggle when he was tickled, and sing German folksongs, and his mother had high hopes that, one day, she might send him to Salzburg, the birthplace of Mozart, to enrol at the Salzburg School of Music. Alas, one day, he found a paintbrush, and world history was changed.

The photographs of baby Hitler were discovered in a Linz shed, wrapped in plastic, under a huge bag of manure.

To view them, click on this link: http://www.GrimHitlerpics.com

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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