Whirling dwarfs and drummer parade led by Snarlin’ Senator Graham again set for US tour

Written by joseph k winter

Monday, 17 June 2019

image for Whirling dwarfs and drummer parade led by Snarlin’ Senator Graham again set for US tour
"My thanks to all the good folks advising me on what to say . . . "

Once again the chant of “war with Iran, war with Iran, war with Iran” has besieged the US landscape.

Communities throughout America can expect the Whirling Dwarfs Parade with their incessant chanting to sweep through town all summer long.

Senator Graham, affectionately known as “Snarlin’ Lin,” will head the parade, dribbling a basketball and slam-dunking any basketball nets along the way through a neighborhood.

“Points on the board! We need ‘em instead of all this wimpy behavior talking about deals,” he exclaims, whirling with his ball and faking a pass.

Mr. Pompeo will join the parade periodically when it stops for a moment to allow him a platform at a town square.

“Do you remember 2003?” he will say. “Do you remember when America at last went forward based on our intelligence at that time into our invasion of Iraq?”

If there’s any silence at this point, other than the sound of the flags rustling and clanking against a pole, he will continue.

“Do you not see that our intelligence once again tells us we must go ahead and deal with this rogue Iran that is now insisting on moving ahead to manufacture nuclear weapons?”

“Which means bomb bomb bomb and bomb again! Do I need to repeat that? We must bomb their nuclear facilities!”

“Points on the board!” Senator Graham calls out loudly in support at this time.

Mr. Trump joins in by video screen:

“Well, I’m not fond of this war idea, but tell you the truth, I’m sick and tired of all of it, especially Mr. Bolton ragging on my ear day after day.”

Melania: “Aw, honey . . .”

Mr. Bolton: “It’s a matter of finally getting on with that list of countries we decided to destroy way back when. I mean why all this delay?”

Mr. Pompeo: “And from there to Venezuela, North Korea, Nicaragua, and Cuba. Plus onward to Mexico— What did you say?”

“They’re cooperating on the immigrant problem for the moment? Well, then, okay, that particular OP is suspended for the time being . . .”

The parade continues from town to town--the drums, the bugles, the flags, the chanting:

“War with Iran, war with Iran, war with Iran” . . .

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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