Old Lady Who Swallowed A Fly, Was On Slippery Slope

Written by Monkey Woods

Tuesday, 9 July 2019

image for Old Lady Who Swallowed A Fly, Was On Slippery Slope
One thing led to another

An old woman who swallowed a horse, acknowledged, shortly before her death, that the key to her demise was actually her initial decision to swallow a fly, something that, once she had done it, could not easily be undone, and she was hooked.

The fly was just one in a long line of other poor choices she made. She also swallowed a whole menagerie of other beasts, including a spider, a bird, a cat, a dog, a goat, and a cow, before finally biting off more than she could chew with the horse.

She told a friend, as she was cramming the horse down her throat that:

Embark

"This is the kind of thing that happens when you embark upon something risky like this, and then find yourself unable to stop. It was an extremely ill-advised thing to do, and, given the same set of circumstances again, I'm sure I would act differently."

Prank

"At first, swallowing the fly seemed a harmless thing to do - a prank, if you will - but once it wiggled and jiggled and tickled inside me, remedial action became necessary, and things escalated from that point on."

Domino effect

"It was the Domino Effect," said the old bag. "One thing led to another, and, before I knew it, I had this horse in my mouth. Addiction is a cruel thing; we don't realize the dangers we are letting ourselves in for."

Senior doctors at one of London's top hospitals have issued guidance on swallowing animals, and advise that it is best avoided, if at all possible.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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