The American Research Group reports that the much-awaited Kimberly Guilfoyle Gin (GG) is now available at your neighborhood liquor stores. The gin, which is 169 proof (84½% alcohol) was produced from a recipe that Kimberly's bootlegging grandfathe…
ALLIGATOR NUTS, Florida – (Satire News) – The fast food industry can be a dog-eat-dog industry; sorry that was a bad choice of words. Tabloid Today is reporting that the $2 billion a year franchise is venturing into new territorial waters. A s…
Straelen, Germany: After a quite hefty birthday party, and boozing session, which took guests to a new limit of alcohol consumption, one of the guests, Herr Samuel Johansson, originally of Viking heritage, but now blessed with Germanic genes, nearly…
One in five Americans is heavily drinking alcohol, according to a new survey conducted by The Harris Poll, one of the top analytics firms. And it appears Covid may be part of the reason. The study was commissioned by an Irish biopharmaceutical compan…
Well, what a final that was. The ball went up then down then up again across the screen, like a game of Pong but on grass. It was literally riveting, and I was glued to my screen for the full two hours, or however long it was. It felt like longer.
Smoking Kills, no doubt, but then again smokers know this fact before puffing away at their favourite drug. Even images of decaying teeth, black lungs cannot stop smokers smoking! The alcohol Australian producing fraternity has also decided to put…
Patrons thought last night was just another night at The Backroom Lounge just outside Rochester. Very few noticed the “giant hairy guy” who sat brooding in a far corner, beyond the pool table, by the Men’s bathroom. “He kept his head down and lo…
The Coronavirus has changed many things about modern life, and it's also radically changed the way some of us think. A case in point is one man who has worried about COVID-19 and its frightening implications so much and so often, that he has arri…
Argentinian former World Cup winner, Diego Maradona, who, throughout his life, has been dogged with problems related to alcohol and drugs, is celebrating today after making it to the one-month mark since he indulged in either. Maradona, 60, won th…
Local bachelor, Stanley Bridgewater, is not looking forward to doing two of his least favourite things tomorrow: drinking in a pub, and talking to strangers in a pub. The lonely 47-year-old, who gets drunk on one pint of shandy, and has not got pa…
A man who has had quite enough of his life in its current dimension, has 'upped sticks' and gone to live in a parallel universe, according to reports. Still using the same physical shell to move about in, Moys Kenwood, 56, 'willed' himself into an...
Prime Minister Boris Johnson may have spoken to the nation, and laid down the law telling people to stay at home during the Coronavirus crisis, with all pubs and clubs to shut, but, for one public house, in particular, this arrangement will not apply...
Frustrated at Americans’ reluctance to abide by even its most tepid dietary guidelines, the long-ignored Food and Drug Administration garnered its most positive attention in decades with the issuance of a press release encouraging Americans to drink...
A waiter at a plush restaurant in New York has said that, after serving customers for nearly 16 years, he is absolutely sick to death of waiting, and is giving up the role, to search for alternative employment. Andrew Skivvy, 34, has taken diners'...
A big proponent of energy conservation, Hal Bailey, of Nashville, Tennessee, got the chance to put his eco-friendly values into practice when he successfully operated on fewer than all cylinders after a night of heavy partying. "I got sloppy waste…
His barley roots notwithstanding, Captain Jack, a whisky of Scotch descent from Brown Water, Missouri, is still feeling his oats. "I get antsy," he said. "I just can't sit distilled." Although aged for over a decade, Captain Jack is not willing to...
A woman who was forced to eat something that she didn't like at a wedding party has said that she felt humiliated in front of the other guests, and that the whole experience has left a nasty taste in her mouth. Wendy O'Kooms, of Dublin, was attend...
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