Hollywood Movie on Banking... the Whole Nine Yards!

Funny story written by Auntie Matter

Sunday, 16 November 2014

image for Hollywood Movie on Banking... the Whole Nine Yards!
It's all about Culture folks!

A new film "The Banker" is set to make Hollywood history. Starring Kevin Costner, Al Pacino, Joe Pizza, Marcella Pretzel and Kevin Downey Junior... this could be the film of the decade. It lifts the lid off the American banking fraternity for good. And, it "pulls no punches", said Variety magazine that reputedly belongs to Freddie Warburgh, great grandson of the famous co-founder of the Federal Reserve Bank.

The comedic highlight of the film is when Senator Aldrich and rogue bankers meet up in Jekyll Island in 1910 to hatch a plot to take over the entire money supply of the United States. It is absolutely hilarious.

Rumours of Masonic symbolism allegedly replete in the movie have been denied by Warner Brothers. Said Publicity Manager Siegfried Rottvein,

"People can read anything into anything.... thank God. This film is not one of them."

The story was written by Benjamin Clitflikker, based on an idea by Olive Clitflikker, produced by Paolo Clitflikker, directed by Angela Clitflikker and starring Penelope Rottvein.

Penelope, who won an Oscar for her supporting role as Marie Antoinette's maid in a film of the same name, is a daughter of Gunther Rottvein who is married to a niece of the Clitflikkers. Said a Warner Bros representative:

"Penelope was perfect for the role. Out of the hundreds we auditioned... she just stood out. It was simply amazing."

The film that lifts the lid on the banking industry and does not hold its punches is certain to cause major debate and discussion in the US. Said Gottfried Rottvein Junior assistant editor of the very popular weekly, "What's On In Hollywood": ...

"My film critic Orlando Clitflikker who was recently nominated for a Pullitzer please note, thinks this could be the masterpiece of 21st century contemporary film. That's how good it is. He is very excited indeed. Martin Scorsese who has fifteen percent of the gross is also very excited. His input on the production was simply amazing, even if he was not there in person."

Penelope, who has already been nominated for an Oscar for her role as the downtrodden emigrant who made good as a bank teller, said:

"Some times you just gotta tell it like it is."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more