Russia's Ban on Gays does not apply to Lesbians, Putin clarifies

Written by Valde Sapiens

Wednesday, 25 September 2013

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In an Op Ed published in yesterday's late edition of the San Francisco Chronicle Russian President Vladimir Putin shed some much awaited light into the recent law enacted in his country banning public demonstration of gay activities.

While same-sex activities between consenting adults was decriminalized in Russia in 1993, the country offers few protections to homosexuals against discrimination. In addition, a law banning any public demonstration or dissemination of material regarding gay activities was enacted by the President recently. This has subsequently drawn harsh criticism from the international community.

Responding to this criticism Mr. Putin explained in the Chronicle "you Yanks are too lazy with your words," he wrote, "instead of using 'gays and lesbians' you use 'gays' to lump together the male homosexuals as well as their female brethren. In Russia, we believe in being precise with our expressions. When we say 'gay' we refer to the dudes only. If we want to refer to the chicks we'll say 'lesbians.' The current law does not prohibit lesbians from doing anything they want, even publicly."

When questioned by a reporter in a dinner party as to why the Motherland is discriminating against men the erstwhile President responded with a wink "oh c'mon, who doesn't enjoy watching a little girl-on-girl action?"

Vladimir Putin is currently serving his third Presidential term and is currently estranged from his wife, Lyudmila Shkrebneva.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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