Bill Clinton, Paris Hilton, Others Change Their Names

Funny story written by Gail Farrelly

Saturday, 16 June 2007

image for Bill Clinton, Paris Hilton, Others Change Their Names
Good-bye Bill. Hello John Doe.

When he heard that Congressman William Jefferson had been indicted on bribery charges, former President William Jefferson Clinton felt that his own name was toast. He quickly changed it to former President John Doe Clinton.

No sooner had Clinton made HIS announcement, when Osama bin Laden decided to follow suit. Just a minor change, one letter only, for him. He's converted "Osama" to "Obama."

Golf champ Tiger Woods has also jumped on the name change bandwagon. Since he'll become a daddy next month, he wanted a first name that was less intimidating, so he's opting for the kinder, gentler "Tigger."

Most surprising of all, Pluto the pooch and Paris Hilton have decided to EXCHANGE names. Poor Pluto, still smarting from the news that Pluto the planet has experienced another demotion (What a loser! Now it's not even considered to be the largest dwarf planet!), wanted to divest himself of THAT name as soon as possible. He feels that Paris the pooch has a nice international flair to it; and the former Paris Hilton feels that the name Pluto Hilton is more suited to "the simple life" she plans to seek for herself once she's released from jail.

Breaking News: Rumor has it that Mark Lowton, owner of The Spoof, will be changing his last name to "Highton," which is much more in keeping with the state of his finances and his exalted reputation, since his website has soared in popularity.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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