BILLINGSGATE POST: Seward County Judge, Cleotus Jefferson, in a preliminary hearing involving the disposition of the case against Defendent Elmer Smuckmeister, who was arrested in Beaver Crossing, Nebraska, for the alleged crime of poking a silicon sheep doll, ordered Constable Hollander to release him, citing, that due to “Invincible ignorance,” defendant Smuckmeister was unable to distinguish between a silicon sheep doll and an actual sheep. Also, because the silicon sheep was unable to testify, a writ of habeas corpus was issued.
Judge Jefferson: “There be no doubt in my mind that the defendant would be guilty as sin for a heinously serious crime, but for the fact that he was unable to distinguish between a silicon sheep and a real sheep. Due to and because of his “Invincible ignorance” the case is unprosecutable, ipsum factum. Due to the inability for the sheep to testify otherwise, as per Notary Sojac and Quasimodo Code No. 757.09; hereto and thereto, the Case is dismissed.”
*Invincible Ignorance: In Catholic theology, “Invincible ignorance” refers to a lack of knowledge that a person could not reasonably be expected to have, and therefore they are not morally culpable for actions or beliefs stemming from that ignorance. This type of ignorance is “invincible” because it cannot be overcome through reasonable effort or diligence.
Dr. Slim: “Elmer is on a roll. Slipped through the cracks once again.”
Dirty: “Yo, Dr. Dude. Sooner or later, AI will bring him to Justice.”
