BILLINGSGATE POST: Just when you thought you had heard it all, the FBI released a 1023 form verifying allegations that crotchless aliens peed on Biden’s bedspread while visiting the White House. This, just a week after a bag of cocaine was found in a locker down the hall from the Oval Office.
It is said that the White House is the most secure building in the World. Even though a mouse couldn’t make it through the checkpoints unobserved, the Secret Service could find no evidence of who might have dropped off the bag of cocaine. On a positive note, they did find video evidence of crotchless aliens peeing on Biden’s bedspread.
Perhaps this sounds familiar. It might be because you remember the Steele Dossier, which was referenced in another FBI 1023. This dossier was used to document the interaction between Trump and two Russian hookers who allegedly peed on Trump’s hotel bed in Moscow.
From FBI Agent John Dennehy (With a heavy Bronx accent):
“Duh...Basically, I been chasing intergalactic aliens most of my career. Although duh image of little green men with big eyes and antennae are what you might expect, most of dem bastards are crotchless geeks equipped with little or no plumbing features. To simplify things, if duh image of incontinent crotchless aliens is disorienting, you’re in duh wrong business…FUGGEDDABOUTDIT!
Dr. Slim: “Somehow, we must absorb them into our society.”
Dirty: “Yo, Dr. Dude. Just add them to the list: LGBTQIA(Aliens).”
