The latest QuinniPinni Poll delivers a resounding blow to Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump's beloved MAGA movement, consigning it to the annals of forgotten relics alongside the Tyrannosaurus Rex, hula hoops, the Edsel, and even Madonna. As Clark Gable once quipped, it is gone with the wind.
With unwavering credibility, the esteemed polling agency surveyed 17 million registered Republicans, revealing a staggering 98.7% who have conceded that MAGA now resides in the deepest depths of hell, lost to the sands of time.
Sanitary landfills across the nation reportedly bear witness to the remnants of those once-proud, red, and flimsy MAGA caps, discarded and forgotten like relics of a bygone era. Even the buzzards, known for their indiscriminate appetites, steer clear of those foul-smelling symbols.
In response to the poll results, Trump nonchalantly took a bite of his Big Mac and dismissed the findings as nothing more than a hoax propagated by disgruntled GOPers, who have seemingly shifted their gaze towards the enigmatic allure of Florida Governor Ron "The Human Hemorrhoid" DeSantis.
As the MAGA empire crumbles, political landscapes continue to evolve, leaving us to wonder what lies ahead in this ever-unpredictable world of power, influence, and, of course, memorable headwear.
