Philadelphia, PA – Former President Donald J Trump was recently seen singing and dancing on the steps of the Art Museum here in the city of Brotherly Love. And the message he shared with the gathering of people left folks with their skin irritated, their lungs burning and temporary (OMG hopefully not permanent) bouts of blindness.
For those at least 100 feet away, his song could be heard sung to the tune of Rocky (albeit with writhing, screaming and vomiting sounds in the background). “BLEACH…! BLEACH FROM MY HANDS…! BLEACH FROM MY HANDS…! BLEACH FROM MY HANDS…!”
As Mr. Trump approached the makeshift podium and addressed most everyone lying down in a face full of their own puke, he was quoted as saying, “Now if this Presidential run thingy doesn’t work out… And I don’t know why it wouldn’t, cuz I’m like the greatest President ever. Other Presidents have come up to me and been like you were actually President and I was like yeah I was. The Greatest. Like that’s why those un-American treasonous swamp deep-state Democrats hated me so much with their totally unhinged wacko rhetoric and agenda. If I decide, nope they’re gonna steal the election from us again, then I’m gonna become your greatest superhero and join the MCU and get my own movie…” The MCU stands for the Marvel Cinematic Universe.
He continued, “So now I just need to meet up with Tony Stark. You know, Iron Man, the head honcho. I’ve sent messages to his house and I’ve had my greatest people contacting his facilities located across these greatest American United States. Tony Stark is probably wettin’ his pants that I’d consider becomin’ the greatest Avenger.”
Only if you were really out there Tony Stark…
