Trump’s Deep Arrest Pockets

Funny story written by Ana Sian

Tuesday, 4 April 2023

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One Used Condom ... and another one and another one and ...

While Trump was being arrested, New York police, of course, had to go through his pockets to see if was carrying any contraband.

What they found:

One used condom.

One small baggie of an unknown white powder.

Ivanka’s love note to her daddy, reading: “I’ll visit you every day, daddums, and I’ll keep your pillow warm.”

Melania’s lipstick (used by Trump … again, WTF?)

Eric’s soother.

Donald Junior’s beard comb and anal lube.

A cameo necklace with a photo of Jeffery Epstein inset.

A not used condom, ribbed for her/his pleasure, size small.

A length of rubber tubing that reached into his underwear. (Wha?)

A pack of cigarettes (to use as currency in jail)

Another used condom, but this one with a gerbil in it.

A syringe filled with an unknown clear fluid … and a bit of blood in it … [sigh] …

Tiffany’s mouth guard.

Rudy’s private phone number (disconnected due to lack of payment).

Hush money.

Stormy Daniels’ measurements and a photo of her stained by a pair of red lipstick lips on …. Ooooooh, now I get what the lipstick was used for … still, WTF?

All belongings were returned to Trump, including the white powder and syringe since no can prove what they are … technically, but everyone knows the truth …

… just like Trump saying “Not Guilty” … but everyone knows the truth …

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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