Melania Having Affair with Secret Service Agent, Doug the Plug

Funny story written by Ana Sian

Thursday, 30 March 2023

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image for Melania Having Affair with Secret Service Agent, Doug the Plug
Only Known Photo of Melania and Doug Holding (the same) Hands! WTF?!

Melania is having an affair with one of her Secret Service goons, nicknamed Doug the Plug. Guess what he plugs!

Donald has no idea. He sleeps a lot, drinks a lot of diet Pepsi (cuz if it’s diet that means you’ll lose weight, right?) and thinks up new and wonderful things to say at his next rally.

Melania has become so brave with Doug that they bang in the elevator and on the sofa in front of other agents and even family members.

Barron may have said, “Mommy … do I have a new daddy?” but the audio wasn’t good so I couldn’t get a decent quote.

What will happen if Donald finds out that his wife is fooling around on him as he fooled around on her (but she probably won’t be getting sued since Doug’s not in porn) … she’s not worried.

“Donald like little baby … he need lot of sleep and food but I don’t give him tit milk no more, only Barron, and never Eric – not since he bit me, little shit!”

We’re not sure who said that but it seems to fit quite well. Enjoy the Plug, Melly-Mel.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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