NEW YORK CITY - (Satire News) - Melania Trump appeared on "The Anderson Cooper Show," and she told him that since she left old "Baby Fingers," she has never been happier.
She revealed to Cooper that the "Old Nazi" (Trump) was born with an undescended tongue.
Melania noted that for the last four years the man that most of the civilized world calls "The Evil Sexual Pervert," has been sullen, gloomy, depressed, and even suicidal.
Melly, as her boyfriend, NBA super star LeBron James calls her, divulged that before she left her toxic-as-shit, no good, worthless husband, he tried to OD by swallowing a bottle of Flintstone Vitamins.
"Really? I mean really fucking really Melly?" Coop asked.
"Jes Andy, I tells tu ju dee trooth and nussing but dee trooth."
And with that Cooper wished her well with her well-endowed boyfriend and he added that he heard from Howard Stern that no female; not even dyed-in-the-wool, devoted Republicanettes will allow the Trumptwat to grab their elbows much less their pussy.■
