LITTLE ROCK, Arkansas - (Satire News) - The newly elected GOP governor of the Anvil State of Arkansas, Sara "The Pillsbury Gal" Huckabee Sanders, is fit to be tied at the rampant lesbionic rumors that are swirling from the Left Coast to the Right Coast.
Writer Voodoo Dupree with Press Extra notes that a pole dancer from Arkadelphia (Ark), says that she saw the governorette, who tips the scales at 241, necking with one of the featured pole dancers at Little Rock's The 10-Foot Pole Lounge.
Govy, as her daddy Mike "The Lying Razorback" Huckabee calls his overly chubby daughter, says that the rumor is positively false because he has never seen his 40-year-old semi-cute daughter ever kiss a female on the lips or anywhere else on her body.
SIDENOTE: Gov. Sarah Huckabee reportedly said that she prefers to be poked by guys than by girls with vibrators.
