Making American Schools Ready to Kill Again

Funny story written by Ana Sian

Tuesday, 23 August 2022

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Guns and Education Equals The Best Schools in the World!

Well, American school children will be heading back to school soon, and boy are they terrified!

“I don’t wanna go! No no NOOOOOOOOO!” screamed a cute little lad going into second grade.

“Will I die this year, mommy?” asked an adorable gal “looking forward” to entering fifth grade.

Some other ADORABLE things kid’s have said concerning the up-coming year in America’s schools (which any American will tell you are the best in the world … except for all the rest – just like democracy as a political system):

“Can we move to Canada?”

“Do I have to carry a gun with my lunch in my backpack?”

“We don’t live in Sandy Hook, do we?”

“Will the bad men on TV shout at us if we complain about guns again, daddy?”

“Is it bad to be an American? Did I do something bad so I have to get shot?”

“Am I a-supposed to get pregnant this year, mommy?”

“How can I have a baby when I’m a baby? Can we move outa Kentucky? Some of my boy teachers are asking me funny questions about getting married.”

“Can I be home-schooled? Not by daddy – he’s got a lotta guns. I like crayons and Sponge Bob stickers.”

“Will I be a pawn again this year?”

“Is the colour of my skin against America?”

“Is President Turnip gonna grope me, daddy? What’s ‘grope’?”

“Mommy, can I be aborted so I don’t get murdered?”

Aren’t they PRECIOUS!

Well, once again, a new generation of Americans (like a new generation of Palestinians) are going to learn to live a “full and long” life of pure, unadulterated FEAR!

Make sure you say the Pledge of Allegiance (“I pledge allegiance to the American Reich!” – no, not that one, unless you’re in a KKK school south of Mason-Dixon) and sing the war song, “The Star-Spangled Snake, Dontcha Tread on Me”, and salute your flag of blood stripes and blue balls and starry eyes.

Place yer bets on how many school shootings there’ll be by November – election time! (Not the whole year, that’s too big of a number.)

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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