President Trump Claims He Was Misunderstood

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Tuesday, 6 October 2020

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Trump: grossly misunderstood

President Trump has been spending some time thinking during his period of rest and recuperation after testing positive for the Coronavirus, and he considers that, overall, his message has been misunderstood by the American people.

When Trump came to power in 2016, his first job, he said, was to "Make America Great Again", but, as many have pointed out, America was already great. Trump clarified this yesterday. He said:

"It was a simple mistake. I meant to say 'grate'. I think I delivered on that one!"

Another area of confusion on behalf of the listeners, he said, was the Mexican Wall.

"I wanted a wall so that Mexicans could feel safe. I love Mexico, and I live Mexican food. And Mexicans can be OK, too, sometimes."

And he claimed that Black people "have him all wrong". Trump says he treats all people equally, and that there isn't a discriminating bone in his body.

"Why, I have a couple of black servants," he said, "and a regular shoeshine boy!"

The President said that his advice about the Coronavirus and how to deal with it was widely misinterpreted.

"I may have said "Don't wear face masks!", but I didn't really expect that people would take that seriously! I assumed they'd know I was only joking!" he chuckled.

"As for the 'nitty-gritty', I meant that the bleach should be used to wash hands, and that the hand sanitizer should be drunk. It's a mistake anyone could make!"

And the wild claim that COVID-19 would disappear of its own accord by Easter?

"Ah, but I didn't say which Easter!", he said.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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