Leaked to the press today by a White House consigliere, (looking for early retirement) Donald Trump decided to select daughter Ivanka for the Supreme Court vacancy created with the death of Justice Ruth Bader Ginsberg.
Tiffany, daughter number two by wife number two, Marla Maples, had an upset. She argued that she had just finished two years of law school, and insisted Ivanka never even attended any law school or classes in the law, and that she, Tiffany, should get the empty seat on the Supreme Court.
Ivanka locked Tiffany in a White House closet.
Jared Kushner, however, already graduated from Harvard law school, and though he never practiced law or even tried a case, insisted that he should, in all justice, be first in the family line up for the Supreme Court vacancy, ahead of both Tiffany and Ivanka.
Ivanka locked Jared in another White House closet.
The consigliere reported that Donald Trump then got an idea. His eyes fluttered with the genius lamp. William Barr was just pulling into the White House in his Ferrari. Trump asked Attorney General William Barr whether he could appoint himself to the Supreme Court. Screw the Nobel Peace Prize.
“Why not?” agreed Attorney General Barr, denting his Ferrari while backing into a parking space. He again nicked the car door while attempting to push himself up and out of the bucket seat, giving it a one, and a two and a push. Bang and denting car door. He had Tripple-A on speed-dial.
“Let’s call it herd mentality and announce that the entire cabinet and Republican Senate and House, and the Joint Chiefs of Staff, whoever they are, decided to nominate me to the U.S. Supreme Court.”
“You bet. And if anyone voices a complaint, we’ll call in Seal Team 6 and wipe them out. The socialist anarchists.”
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