Trump promises Aunt Jemima a top White House Christmas tree

Written by susan allen-rosario

Sunday, 21 June 2020

image for Trump promises Aunt Jemima a top White House Christmas tree
"It will be huge, very big."

President Trump, in an effort to appeal to black voters, stated they will all get a big surprise in their stockings this year.

"I'm having a fantastic tree topper of Aunt Jemima made for the White House Christmas tree. In addition to that, I will be renaming the White House the "Black Home Boys Crib" for the entire month of January.

When the President was reminded the Christmas is in December, he stated that Christmas can be moved easily.

"I plan on employing black workers to move the whole day...it will be huge,very big for the unemployed blacks."

He went on to say that he is looking into finding a "deeply brown" tree instead of an evergreen.

"I talked to a guy in Detroit that makes them out of the remains of old auto body factories. Since we are never going to get those factories working again, I say use them. That's what I do best, use things. A stone tree, a metal tree...big and amazing. That's what the biggest and most amazing president the world has ever seen does for HIS people."

When asked if the very big, huge Aunt Jemima will be full of syrup, a spokesperson for the President said: "That's a sticky subject, pending further review."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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