A Costa Rican ‘Tourist’ Caught Trying to Smuggle 70 Rolls of Charmin Toilet Paper Into the USA

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Wednesday, 1 April 2020

image for A Costa Rican ‘Tourist’ Caught Trying to Smuggle 70 Rolls of Charmin Toilet Paper Into the USA
It took P.P. Belinski 51 days to dig this 65-foot tunnel located under the U.S.-Mexico border wall.

CALEXICO, California - Border Patrol agents in the border town of Calexico have apprehended a person they described as being an illegal tourist.

Agents Dusty Voight and Chauncey Ortega said that they were patrolling the border wall between Calexico and Mexicali, Mexico, when they saw a man emerge from what turned out to be a 65-foot tunnel.

The man, identified as Pablo Pedro Belinski, 19, said that it took him 51 days to dig the tunnel.

When asked what he had used to dig the tunnel, he showed the agents a plastic ice cream spoon that he had gotten at a Dairy Queen in Mexicali.

Belinski was apprehended in possession of 70 rolls of Charmin. Agent Ortega asked what he was going to do with all of the rolls, and Pedro replied, “I wuzz going tu take dem tu Beberlee Heels.”

He confessed that his boss had given him a list of celebrities who had placed orders for the hard-to-find toilet paper.

Agent Voight estimated that the 70 rolls of toilet paper had a street value of 14,000 pesos ($560 in US money).

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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