Residents of A Senior Citizens Home in Nebraska Are Passing the Time by Playing Twister

Written by Abel Rodriguez

Monday, 30 March 2020

image for Residents of A Senior Citizens Home in Nebraska Are Passing the Time by Playing Twister
The Caluchee sisters Miranda (L) and Tessy (R) say they get lots of exercise playing Twister, Bingo, and singing Karaoke.

BROKEN BOW, Nebraska - Flossie Wunderwurst, the director of The Napping Nightingale Senior Citizens Home, which houses 603 older men and women, states that, everyone in the entire home is doing well and are in a happy mood, considering.

The long-time director then remarked, “Well, except for 96-year-old Cosmo Babbinski, who has been at the home for 37 years, and keeps getting grouchier by the minute.”

Flossie commented that it seems that Cosmo has a World War II elbow injury that flares up from time to time, causing him to spill his cup of Johnny Walker Red all over some of the older residents.

Wunderwurst pointed out that, on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Fridays, the group of old people play Twister, which everyone enjoys, especially the staff members, who get to cheer on their favorite oldsters.

Sadly, last Tuesday, one of the older residents, Fannie Cornweiser, who had just turned 103, accidentally got so twisted, that they had to call the fire department to rush over and untwist her.

After 20 minutes of having to listen to the crazed banshee screaming, the seven firemen managed to untwist her.

The entire home gave the firefighters a sitting ovation.

Doctors expect to release Fannie from the home’s trauma room in four or five days.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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