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Man Invents Breakthrough Contraption That Assist Old People Who Are Always Forgetting Shit

Funny story: Man Invents Breakthrough Contraption That Assist Old People Who Are Always Forgetting Shit

Omaha, Nebraska - A lifelong resident here, has created a breakthrough invention for aging adults with memory troubles. Philip Myers, 63, claims The Invention will change people's lives. "It happens to all of us old folks," states Myers. "We're si...

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Ricketts Premeditates State Executions

Lincoln, Nebraska - Despite the fact that Governor Pete Ricketts' veto to repeal the death penalty was overridden by Nebraskan State Senators, Ricketts has promised to continue with executions. In his first attempt, he made a deal with an undergr...

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Nebraska First State to Prohibit Texting While in an Accident

The state of Nebraska has passed strict regulations prohibiting texting while in a car accident. They have added the clause describing any such accident as "fatal or not," adding what they consider to be "real strength" to the law. A spokespers...

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Woman almost kills child by accident after ringing poison information line

Funny story: Woman almost kills child by accident after ringing poison information line

Lincoln, Nebraska- A woman frantically rang a local poison information line after her 7 year old daughter ate some black carpenter ants in the back yard. The operator assured her that the ants were harmless but advised against the child eating any...

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Nebraska Groups Move To Ban Internet Porn

Funny story: Nebraska Groups Move To Ban Internet Porn

LINCOLN, Nebraska - There is presently a movement in the state of Nebraska to prevent the state's residents from viewing porn on the thousands and thousands of Internet porn sites. Several groups are advocating the banning of these vulgarian sites...

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Rosie O'Donnell Gets Extremely Offended At The Sex-Change Insinuation

Funny story: Rosie O'Donnell Gets Extremely Offended At The Sex-Change Insinuation

OGALLALA, Nebraska - Rosie O'Donnell was in Ogallala where she was the grand marshal of The Annual Corn Cob Festival and Parade. She was having breakfast at a local Flat As A Pancake Pancake House with two of the town council members Flora Mimosa...

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George and Barbara Bush Finally Give Up on W., Dump Him At Nebraska Hospital!

Funny story: George and Barbara Bush Finally Give Up on W., Dump Him At Nebraska Hospital!

Omaha,NE, Children's Hospital - Citing Nebraska's Safe Haven Law to take in unruly children, The Former President and First Lady, dropped off the current President, George W., hoping the action would finally give the nation some peace during the dec...

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Fear Factor Exposes Nebraska Town's Dirty Secret

Funny story: Fear Factor Exposes Nebraska Town's Dirty Secret

MILFORD, NE --- For three months, Nebraska's cattle industry robber barons had been able to keep a lid on their smelly secret. And if it hadn't been for one of TV's top rating reality shows, no one except the residents of Seward County would have kn...

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National draft may affect Local Procrastinator

Funny story: National draft may affect Local Procrastinator

Broken Bow, Nebraska...

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Breaking news…

Trump Says Democrats Should Thank Him for Being Such A Terrible President

...Because they never would've won the House by such a wide margin without him!
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