WASHINGTON, D.C. – Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi texted Devin “No Nuts” Nunes and informed him that he will be subpoenaed, and he will have to show the nude photos of President Trump that he allegedly has.
Nunes texted “Cupcakes” Pelosi back, and said that, if he had photos of his BFF Donnie Trumpy, he would sell them to the National Enquirer before he would turn them over to the Democrats.
An inside White House source said that he has not seen the nude photos of “El Presidente Estupido,” as POTUS is known all throughout Mexico, all over Central America, South America, as well as in East Los Angeles.
The White House source did reveal that he saw Nunes in the mens restroom two weeks ago, and "Devy" does have what appears to be a likeness of Trump’s face on his right nut.
A reporter for The Baltimore Beacon Star said that he spoke with Devin’s urologist, and was told that the Trump likeness is actually on Devin’s left nut and not his right nut.
IN OTHER NEWS – A consumer advocate group is reporting that in the 3-plus years that Melania Trump has been the first lady, she has spent over $247,000 on #45 Sunscreen.