President Trump Says Coronavirus Should Have Been 'Nipped In The Bud' By Nuking China

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Sunday, 9 February 2020

image for President Trump Says Coronavirus Should Have Been 'Nipped In The Bud' By Nuking China
It may now be too late

President Donald Trump has spoken out about the spread of the deadly Coronavirus, and says that he, personally, could have ended the worldwide threat of a pandemic, if only he'd have been allowed to initiate an all-out nuclear strike on China, instead of having to concern himself with a pointless impeachment trial.

The virus, which has now claimed the lives of more than 800 people within China, could have been stopped in its tracks, says Trump, by utilizing America's nuclear weaponry to its fullest extent, and blasting China into oblivion.

China has around 160 centers of population with 1,000,000 or more residents, and with US missiles locked-on to them whilst the Chinese authorities are battling to keep the Coronavirus outbreak under control, it's very likely that the missiles would have found their targets without Beijing having time to respond.

President Trump, himself, thinks that the Coronavirus is something the Chinese have been developing as part of a germ warfare program, but which 'got out of hand'. Mistakes were made, and it escaped the lab.

Now, the world is on the verge of a pandemic.

He tweeted from the White House, last night:

"They woulda used that virus on us, so I think we should help them eradicate it."

The Big, Red Button watched, and said nothing.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more