Nashville Man Admits Cat Can Be a Little Petty

Funny story written by Chrissy Benson

Monday, 20 January 2020

image for Nashville Man Admits Cat Can Be a Little Petty
According to her human companion, this feline's preferred love language is touch.

"No matter what else I have going on, all she ever wants is to be snuggled and cuddled and stroked," said Wade Johnson of Nashville, Tennessee, regarding his beloved feline animal companion, Ginny. "I hate to say it, but honestly, she can be a little petty."

Johnson went on to explain that Ginny shows very little interest in world affairs, or even in his own professional progress. "I got a promotion at work, and she could have cared less," he said. "I don't even know if it's even registered with her that I'm a manager now."

Johnson noted, too, that, in his view, Ginny tends to overly emphasize the physical. "We're different that way. She's very practical and pleasure-oriented, whereas I'm more ethereal. And her preferred love language is most definitely touch."

He added, ."It's good, though, that whenever I get too caught up in my head, she's always able to bring me back to earth."

Johnson emphasized, however, that, for all Ginny's existential complacency and seeming lack of concern with the bigger picture, he couldn't have asked for a better mate. "Our chemistry is off the charts," he said. "Talk about heavy petting - whew! Ginny's a master. Even after eight years, I still can't get enough."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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