Donald Trump survives Halloween

Written by Ben Macnair

Friday, 1 November 2019

image for Donald Trump survives Halloween
Stan Bridgewater, dressed up for a night on the town.

A pumpkin, carved as the embodiment of evil, Donald Trump, has survived Halloween.

Gary Thomas, a six-week old pumpkin, was picked by Democrat supporter Brick Socks, and was soon repeatedly stabbed through his thick orange skin, until the gawping, evil face of Trump emerged.

'It hurt like hell,' said Thomas, 'but I was quite proud of what I became. Most pumpkins end up as landfill, but at least someone bought me. However, it was great that my flesh was turned into a pumpkin pie, because it gave Brick the runs. Oh, I still laugh about that.'

Gary Thomas was later kicked around by a group of school children. The savages.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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