Trump Says Iran "Unlucky", And Blames Luke Rhinehart's Book

Written by Monkey Woods

Friday, 21 June 2019

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War or peace? Iran - at the mercy of a roll of the dice

President Donald Trump has said that Iran was just "unlucky" having had war declared upon itself by the US, and, had he rolled anything other than a 6, might have escaped the coming conflict, but that's just how the cookie crumbles.

Trump was tweeting from the White House last night, and described how five other 'possible enemies' had been identified - and then spared - as the dice thrown landed on 6, Iran.

The president learned of his new decision-making process after being told about a book - The Dice Man by Luke Rhinehart - in which the central character makes all kinds of choices based on the numbers on the face of a dice.

"Great for saving time! Quick and easy!! No difficult things to think about anymore!!! No more 'brain pain'!!!! Yahoo!!!!!" tweeted Trump.

For novelty value, Trump had included on his shortlist of 'aggressors', France as number 2, and Great Britain as number 3.

The list in full:

1. Iran
2. Frans
3. Grate Britten
4. Iran
5. Iran
6. Iran

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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