Trump Pardons Racehorse, Blames Robert Mueller As Maximum Security Bombs

Written by queen mudder

Sunday, 5 May 2019

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Mueller not to blame for daft presidential whorse

Louisville, Kentucky - Racecourse stewards ‘in league with Special Counsel Robert Mueller’ likely robbed 9-2 Kentucky Derby pick Maximum Security of victory, a presidential spokesperson said today.

Trump reportedly lost a packet backing the Jason Servis-trained colt which stewards relegated from first to seventeenth position after it pranged a bunch of rivals in Louisville’s sloppy dirt.

The decision saw 85-1 wildcard outsider Country House take the run-for-the-roses honors, triggering the president’s deranged kneejerk tweetfest which pardoned the demoted loser.

“Maximum Security has been reinstated by Presidential Pardon,” the Capitol Hill blowhard said.

Bookies may now be forced to pay out on Trump’s original $1m wager, unless a congressional committee hires special counsel Robert Mueller to check out the situation.

Click here for frame-by-frame footage of the president’s latest scam.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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