BILLINGSGATE POST: Mayan High Chief God Emeritus, Hokum Hokum, whose prediction of the end of the World failed to materialize on December 21, 2012, accepted the fact that he was overly optimistic when he warned the World’s inhabitants that they would be toast on that date.
In an interview conducted by intrepid reporter Slim Everdingle, from Chief Hokum’s underground luxury “survival condo” located in an abandoned Kansas missile silo, Hokum suggests his faulty prognostication was the result of inferior human sacrifices. He blames overly protective “helicopter parents” for not preparing their infants for human sacrifice rituals that traditionally precede doomsday predictions.
“Goats and pigeons can’t take their place,” opined the Chief.
Careful not to judge anyone for worrying about their demise, he told Everdingle that he could get him a discount on an adjacent survival condo being remodeled just down the block.
“Doomsday could last for many years,” he explained to Everdingle.
NOTE: Chief Hokum Hokum is a licensed real estate agent in the State of Kansas.