Wisconsin Resident Angry That Hoia-Baciu Forest In Romania Was Ranked "Second" On Random Website Last Weekend

Written by Wesley Janson

Saturday, 13 April 2019

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Platteville, Wisconsin. 39-year-old Craig Harvell threw a massive and profoundly psychotic fit on Friday, April 5th at 11:45 pm when he drunkenly saw a random website that had the Hoia-Baciu Forest in Romania ranked "second" on the list of the World's Most Haunted Forests.

Purely outraged that "some stupid 'poopy' forest in France" was ranked number one over the legendary forest associated with Vlad The Impaler and Bram Stoker's Dracula, Mr. Harvell felt the author of the website, that he can't find anymore, had called the score completely wrong.

"GOD DAMNIT!"..."SHIT!"...and "FUCK!" were just a few of the words he bellowed while his neighbors and friends silently mourned all of the Green Bay Packer losses that had occurred during the previous NFL Season.

"That forest had everything going for it," Craig told reporters.

"It has hordes of legless entities floating through mid-air, UFO sightings, a plethora of paranormal activity and terrifying noises, stories of people who disappear completely and then reappear years later looking the same age, crooked tree growth, electrical orbs hovering around, faces in photographs that can't be explained, a particular 'heaviness' that produces tremendous amounts of anxiety and soul-crippling fear, and possibly even a relentlessly ferocious demonic entity that lurks deep within the shadows at night," he added.

Although frustrated with the loss, Mr. Harvell hopes that the "Bermuda Triangle Of Romania" will do better next weekend.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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