Witches Spell On Kavanaugh Proof Of Witch Hunt Says Trump

Written by Talking Tic-Tacs

Sunday, 21 October 2018

image for Witches Spell On Kavanaugh Proof Of Witch Hunt Says Trump
"Witch hunts, hunting witches...tomaito tomato."

Donald Trump has reiterated his use of the term "witch-hunt" after actual witches placed a spell on Supreme Court Judge Brett Kavanaugh.

Having had the same thing happen to himself last year, the President appeared even more emboldened than usual and felt "totally vindicated" following yesterday's witchcraft event in Brooklyn where a 'hex', or spell, or load of utter nonsense, was placed on controversially elected Judge Kavanaugh.

"I said it was a witch-hunt, I did, I did say that didn't I, and once again we have hard evidence folks, of literal WITCHES HUNTING US!"

Several women accused Judge Kavanaugh ('naw', not 'na') of improper conduct towards them as opposition to his nomination to the Supreme Court grew. The President subsequently labelled it a 'witch-hunt'.

"All you people - well a lot of you people, not my people, because they're very...great people - have been attacking me from day one, and since he was nominated, poor Brett too."

"I've said for months that there is a witch-hunt against him and now witches are hunting against him!" he said.

Language expert Phil Linguist said "Witch-hunts aren't about witches hunting anyone, the phrase means the hunting of witches. So although Trump is feeling vindicated he's completely misunderstood the meaning of the phrase. However, simultaneously, yea totally, witches are bitches."

When asked for his reaction to the witches' spell put on him, the Supreme Court Judge Brett Kavanaugh said, "I like beer!"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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