Trump Threatens News Credentials

Written by K.C. Bell

Thursday, 10 May 2018

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"No news is good news!"

Even though The Spoof news reporters are not allowed within ten miles of the White House, Mar-a-Lago or any of his golf courses, Donald Trump is threatening to cancel and remove all news credentials of journalists including those of The Spoof reporters.

While condemning, but distinguishing The Spoof news articles as an example of FAKE news, Trump tweeted his displeasure using a number of: misspelled words, unnecessary capitalizations, superlatives, (also misspelled) missing punctuation, added unnecessary punctuation, plagiarism, (a contagious family disease) with continued pointless repetition.


So the guy failed elementary school grammar, and high school English, history, civics, social studies, math, hygiene, (face permanently stained orange due to failed wash-up) and understanding the schoolyard definition of satire. However, he must have excelled in study hall. No one fails study hall.

While Spoof reporters identify their threatened credential loss as a badge of honor, the White House press corps was outraged, expressing their views intelligently, the press corps defended their First Amendment rights, noting it was an establish part of democracy in the United States. Additionally, the press corps insisted it was loyal to the truth and committed to reporting the news, however critical or negative it may be as a result of Mr. Trump’s actions.

"Putin does Everything He wants and He is never criticized by the Russian press! Sad…"

A brave reporter pointed out that 34 journalists have died mysteriously since Putin took office in 2000, and political opponents were jailed, poisoned or fell out of windows while in foreign countries.

"There are bad people on both sides…"

“Don’t invite Trump to my funeral.” This from a fearless American hero, imprisoned by the Vietnamese for five and a half years, and forgave his Vietnamese torturers.

"I like heroes who weren’t captured…"

Rudolph Giuliani, Trump’s good friend and latest attempt at an Atticus Finch representation, announced that Trump would have to take the 5th, or he will incriminate himself and get caught in a perjury trap.

Right on the button. Apparently, the truth will produce incrimination.

"I’m not taking a 5th. I don’t drink!"

Pass a glass of satire.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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