New York, NY In his latest press conference, Trump announced his intended Cabinet for what he believes will be his upcoming Presidency.
He named:
Vice-President-Chris Christie-Because he knows a lot about Vice.
Secretary of State-Angelina Jolie-Because she has great legs and Trump thinks a secretary should have great legs.
Secretary of Defense-Clint Eastwood so he could ask the Russians and North Koreans if they're feeling lucky.
Secretary of Treasury-Donald Trump-Because he doesn't trust anyone else with the money but him.
Attorney General-John Ashcroft, because he's already proved he's a real nut case, covering up all the statue's breasts. We're going to need a laugh every once in awhile.
Secretary of Agriculture-Tim McGraw--Because Trump really likes his "Down on the Farm" song.
Secretary of the Interior-Scarlett Johansson because Trump says he would really like to see her interior sometime.
Secretary of Labor-Ivanka Trump-Because Trump says she went into labor for all their kids and did it well.
Secretary of Homeland Security-Joe Mantagna-Because he seems to keep the U.S. safe every week on Criminal Minds.
Secretary of Energy-Mary Lou Retton, because she always has such energy.
Secretary of Transportation-Jay Leno, since he has such a great car collection.
Secretary of Veteran's Affairs-Chuck Norris, a real veteran.
Secretary of Education-Tony Danza, since he has so much experience.
Secretary of Health and Human Services-Richard Simmons
Secretary of Housing and Urban Affairs-Howard Stern, because I promised him something in my Cabinet.
Secretary of Commerce-Rick Harrison from Pawn Stars.
Trump says he might have to tell some of them "You're fired" until he gets the right mix.
